This is Not Love

This Is Not Love
Written By Arita Phillip
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Photo by Lucxama Sylvain from Pexels

Model: Syndie Maitre

Control is not love. Obsession is not love. Harassing a person to respond in a certain time frame is not love. That’s entitlement.

We don’t own people. We have access to them, that can be rescinded. Romantic love is conditional. If you hurt, disrespect someone’s boundaries or exhibit behaviours that are entitled, argumentative or manipulative, a person has every right to permanently or temporarily withdraw. Love is not dangerous. Any feelings platonic or romantic that force a person to relax their boundaries is a direct threat to a persons mental emotional and physical health. It is toxic.

Self love is the bedrock of being able to value and exist in any relationship in a healthy way. An old akan proverb says; beware of a naked man who offers you a shirt. A person can only meet you as far as they’ve met themselves. Love is not a feeling, love is a choice. Choose yourself then choose well my darlings.

Arita Phillip

Hi! My name is Arita from Antigua. I’m an activist and founder of the NGO Alternative 268 with an educational background in government, international relations and public policy.

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