If you’re anything like me
If you’re anything like me, you’ve probably known for a long long time that your mental landscape is very different…
Flight
We watched the queens of New Kingston in the gayest gully on earth caged birds with ambitions to soar grounded by clipped wings
VELVETS IN THE FIELD
What they call self-care today
It is we who showed you the way
I do not fall
Because I know boys such as this
who reach their hand out to me and call
“Jump! I’ll catch you!”
And as I edge,
Closer to the ledge
Toes half in gravity, trepidatious, I reply
“You see I’ve fallen before-
I’ve crashed to the ground.
I’ve tasted the earth, the soil, and the gravel”
In The Bowels of Her Memory
Maybe this is the time to come clean. This is the salvation, the sign she had been beseeching the universe for the last four years. Or maybe this is a trap. To admit the abuse, would be to admit her weakness.
Wrinkled Memory
There are pockets in my mind
that empty themselves
hold coins of memory?
Take Me or Leave Me
Maybe this is the time to come clean. This is the salvation, the sign she had been beseeching the universe for the last four years. Or maybe this is a trap. To admit the abuse, would be to admit her weakness.
Is This Because I’m Gay?
I chose not to be heartless,
I wasn't born with all these scars,
And that's what made me like this,
I'm trying to hold my breath,
To grab hold of a better life,
But until gays are free,
My happiness will never be enough for me,
The Darkest of Purple
Here I am
Naked but cloaked
Shamed in knowing
I see her
Mental Health
After my mom died…
Depression
Stone-cold to the touch
Body like a slug, just drifting through life
Leaving behind a trail of darkness and pain
The Clean Up
The apartment will feel like you are being suffocated….
He is like Him
In his physique.
A body made beautiful now distorted
He folds over himself as if
To make up for his size he shrinks his impact
I, Atlas
I am Atlas and the burden of the world is my own. Suffocating under the weight of continents, the whisper of dreams, hopes and prayers that fill the air.
I lied to my therapist
Shit! Back at it again. You see, one thing those mental health gurus fail to tell you on instagram lives is how much relapse is a bitch.
This is Not Love
Control is not love. Obsession is not love. Harassing a person to respond in a certain time frame is not love. That’s entitlement.
Take Flight
Once a year you give me permission the fly above your judgement so you may enjoy me
…. You think.
Music for 1
The soca song “Lucille” by Jestura was the anthem for Shilva especially around Carnival season.
Red looks like Ruby – The abuse we don’t see
Being in love is a sensation like no other. The feeling of being validated...I got the guy! He told me that the way our feelings developed for each other were so unique and effortless. He never wants to lose it
Big Brains > Big Ass
My body is also a topic of conversation when I walk into a room. Family members and friends all feel the need to tell jokes about my body.